just for now.

-Got my hair trimmed.

-Fumed over the stupidity of our food industry. When factory-produced eggs are rotten, do we hear a public out cry over the way this “food” is produced? Not enough.

Maybe we should just buy our food from someone we know, or can at least meet, like a local farmer. Maybe?
And how many recalls have we had over the last few years for peanut butter, spinach, eggs? Too many.
But if someone gets sick off of raw milk, the government treats it like a crime against humanity.
Come on. Seriously?

-Snuggled with Isaiah and Zoyenka. We’re all so snuggly recently. I know my hormones are big right now, and maybe the kids are just warming up for baby, too. Whatever. I love it.

-Wore my *beautiful* new robe for the first time. Thanks to my amazing sister, Katie!! (Link takes you to my Wish List where you’ll see the robe at the bottom)
I am beyond excited to have such a delicate, feminine robe to wear that won’t make me feel baggy. Especially after the baby’s born and I may just have to live in it.

-Dropped Levi off at the airport super early– woke up at 3am and took the kids. I’m glad I did. Zoe took a long nap when we got home so I was able to doze on the couch with Isaiah while he watched his “boy shows.”

-I tweeted yesterday that I was grounding myself today until all the dishes were cleaned. Or maybe that was yesterday and the day before? Anyway. The dishes are now all clean. This always makes me way too happy.

-I’ve been using my tea tree essential oil ALL over the house. I put it in a spray bottle with vinegar/water/grapefruit seed extract for cleaning, like, everything and anything. I also put some inside both diaper pails and in my mop water.

-Tomorrow is my (one day shy of) 39 week check up!! I’m really excited to find out how far along “things” are and debrief with my midwife. I’ve just started walking about a mile in the morning with the kids and plan to until the baby’s born. Yes, the last two weeks…it’s better than nothing. Not that I haven’t ever exercised this pregnancy, but it’s been way more sparse than with the last two.

-That’s all for now as I need to finish watching Monday’s latest “Lie to Me.” I am very much a fan of this show.

Goodnight.

They’re just the best kids/babies ever.

Zoe told me today that she’s still a baby. I think I needed to hear that…because she and the new baby boy will be closer in age than I had thought would be best…so I have been slowly realizing that I will just be having two babies for a while. And of course that’s okay! I just don’t want to force Zo to act older than she is. Lots of people have two or more babies at once– whether twins or just close in age. You know?

I just hadn’t thought of it like that before…

Isaiah rode his first ferris wheel a couple night’s ago at the Fredburg Agricultural Fair. Levi said he didn’t freak out at all and was just going, “WOW! We’re up in the SKY!”

Tonight he got out of bed (which we make a big deal out of because he will do it 50 times if you don’t set boundaries) and told me, “This is really important, mommy.”

“What?”

“I’m scared.”

So we talked about that for a while, and while I know that 99% of the time this is a stalling tactic, I didn’t want to completely discredit him. I told him that God has angels and one of their super-powers is that they’re invisible, so even if he can’t see them they’re there, and they have big swords. And also I’m downstairs and I won’t let any bad guys in.

“You can pray and talk to God about His angels. Maybe he’ll let you see some.”

Woops.

Two minutes later his little head pops around the banister. “Mommy! This is important….um, God didn’t hear me!” he said tearfully.

Well, I knew that the tears and drama were in large part due to the fact that we’d been out since 9am that morning, running on things like donuts and IKEA food and very little nap time, but you just don’t belittle a comment like that.

So we had a big long talk. It was actually pretty fun for me to try and explain God and praying and bad guys and heaven and everything in between in appropriate 3 year old vocabulary. Do you know how simply they must see the world? I don’t want to cloud his healthy childishness with lots of religious jargon, so it really brings things down to the bare necessities. In a very good way.

Basically, I have two of the smartest, sweetest, most sensitive children I know about, and I’m super proud to be their mommy.

Goodnight.

Some adorableNESS from yesterday and today.
Pictures 1-4: Kiddos at local farm with the most ahhhmazing yogurt. We’ve already eaten 1.5 quarts in a day and a half.
Picture 5: bathtime. Which Zoe has been requesting 3x a day by making a splashing motion with her hands.
Picture 6: My husband sent me flowers today out of the blue!! Sooooo happy. I love these colors right now.
Picture 7: Zoe with her dollies in their stroller. She absolutely LOVES posing for pictures now and looking at herself in them.
Picture 8: The ever-expanding stomach. I’m measuring around 34/35 weeks. It’s so fun right now getting ready and nesting/cleaning all the time.

About 11 weeks.

I feel like I have a beer gut. I know you look at this picture and think I’m just self-conscious, but no, seriously. If you saw my stomach 3 months ago you’d notice the change too. It’s such an awkward phase because my uterus is growing– pushing things out of it’s way and rearranging my digestive system, but the only thing visibly sticking out is that last stubborn layer of chub that didn’t leave after Zoe’s birth. Okay, actually, it probably isn’t that stubborn. I didn’t try really hard to work it off or anything, and when I’m breastfeeding I never plan to try and get super skinny or muscular. I’d rather keep a little baby fat and feed my babies well.

Speaking of my babies–

Here they are a couple of minutes ago, being cute. Zoe loves this little scooter thing and Isaiah got the genius idea to help push her along from behind. They were giggling and laughing and then they wiped out. Zoe ran to me for hug and then ran right back to take a ride into the kitchen to visit daddy.

Here’s a little cuteness update. They make me happy when skies are grey.

Zoyenka is, at 16 months, practically a teenager. She likes what she likes and you will not convince her otherwise. This little face is one of her favorites in her large collection. She loves/loves/loves to give kisses, and especially likes to love on daddy. My heart gets so many smiles from watching her little ’self’ assert itself freely and abundantly. I feel challenged and blessed to be able to try and create a healthy environment to let her blossom in.

I was reminded today that you cannot “train” bad behavior out of a child, no matter how hard you try or how perfect you are….I do want to put healthy boundaries in place to keep her safe, but I’m not so pompous to believe I can make her holy by teaching her to obey me without question. I feel like I’m going on and on. I guess I’m just really, really inspired to find that fine line between the discipline that must take place (can’t let them eat ice-cream every day even though they would definitely choose to!) and the preservation of self-will that I’d like to see in my kiddos.

Isaiah, my treasure. My three year old. He is growing into a little man so super, duper fast. He’s also starting to hear and see things we didn’t use to have to worry about. So that’s challenging. Today I was watching a TV show where one scene had a little girl being told by a nurse that her mommy had died in a car accident. I didn’t realize Isaiah was paying any attention until a couple minutes later when he said, “That girl sad, her mommy die.”

Oh my heart! “Yeah Zay, she is sad…” And then I tried to talk to him a little about how that made him feel. He’s totally open about his feelings and it’s so sweet to watch a perfectly little transparent soul in process.

When he has to do something he doesn’t want to he often says, “I’m MAD!” and then, “It’s okay to be mad.” Because we’ve told him that it is. Usually we then have to remind him that it’s okay to be mad, but you can’t throw a fit or hurt people. It’s been a really interesting process for me to go through Isaiah’s emotions with him and really have to re-think the way I think in light of those questioning little three-year-old eyes. We don’t want to tell him that he can’t have strong emotion, at the same time, we don’t endorse “NO I WON’T PUT ON MY COAT” fits, you know?

But is there hope for moderation in such a young child’s life? I think so. We’ve seen glimmers. And I really do get a kick out of those “It’s okay to be angry!” moments. It’s always, always a reminder back at myself that yes, Heather, you can get angry and frustrated, but how you channel that emotion is the part you can do right or wrong.

All taken with my cell phone. I’m proud…of the pictures and, of course, the surpassing cuteness of my children.